Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
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