You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
Randomize