How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
birth control should be required to get into college
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
We have so much sex to catch up on
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Randomize
