Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
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