Ikea night.
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Insert tab A into swedish slot B
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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