hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
He literally asked permission to hit on me
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