I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
Randomize
