You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
After last night, I think I need a service animal to monitor the life choices I make when I'm inebriated. A monkey, or a clever dog. Or a really assertive parrot.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
