Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
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