We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize