I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
