On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
Randomize
