If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
Randomize
