absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
Randomize
