Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
Randomize
