he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
