She went from zero to smokin in five shots
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
Randomize
