Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
We just shotgunned beers for America
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
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