hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
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