Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
Randomize
