ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
I forgot i ate a salad for dinner, so while i was barfing in his toilet, i kept screaming "i ate leaves?? i cant believe you let me eat leaves!"
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Randomize
