Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
well you can't waste a boner
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Randomize
