I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
