i don't like sucking hair
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Randomize