I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize
