I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
Randomize
