is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
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