God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
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