he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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