Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
Randomize
