But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Randomize
