I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
Randomize
