i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
Randomize
