My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
Randomize
