singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
Randomize
