did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
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