But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
