Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Randomize
