Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
is that a dick in a sweater?
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize
