you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
Randomize
