Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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