you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
birth control should be required to get into college
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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