Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Randomize