Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
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