Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
