Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
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