butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Randomize