5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
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