I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
