I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
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